April 22, 2013
So, you think that Farmer Simulator is a bad game? Probably not anymore after you’ve seen these 5 horrible Simulator games. These are all on the PC and i’ve tried to play some of them.
I hope that you guys appreciate it because it was no fun playing these games, seriously it was really boring and i was raging a lot while playing these games. I’ve only played 3 of them and the thing is that i haven’t even played number one, I thought that i’d smash my monitor if i had to play it and that’s why i didn’t.
Enough of that though, let’s start the review!
This game looks really good actually, it’s one of the only simulator game with good graphics.
The thing that’s so bad about this game is the controls. Your in control of ONE hand. Seriously? You’re going to do a surgery with one hand? Don’t think so. I’m actually glad that you only control one hand because it’s hard to control one hand, i can only image how bad it would be if you had to control both hands.
Anyway, so you might think now that it wouldn’t be so bad. Control the hand with the mouse and left click to pick items up, You’re wrong. You use the A-W-E-R-SPACEBAR keys to grab items. So if i want to pick up a knife, it means that i have to press these keys in the right order as you would pick up a knife, Pinkie first and that stuff. If the controls were a little bit easier, this game wouldn’t be on number 5.
Sadly, most of the time i was cutting the patient and poisoning myself because i failed so bad at the controls.
As you could guess, this game is Garbage. I understand that these simulator games are made f0r educational purposes. But they could at least try to make them a little bit realistic. In this game you can literally turn 90 degrees while standing still. This means that the controls are even worse than the controls of Surgeon Simulator.
The thing is, when you run into a fence you’ll lose about 30 dollars, nothing else. When you drive into a car, it disappears and you lose some money and with that you’ll continue driving around with these messed up controls. The worst thing in this game is, when you run someone over with your truck your route will end and they’ll call it a ‘Traffic Violation’. “You just killed someone with your truck, stop your route and restart so you’ll never do it again..” Don’t think so.
If the controls weren’t as bad as they actually are, this game still would suck because there is NOTHING to do. You drive to a street, pick up the garbage, throw it in the truck and that’s all. You keep doing this and that’s how you earn money for new trucks and other unnecessary items.
Someone hang me a screwdriver so I can stab myself in the eyes – because after playing this game, I promise you, that’s what you’ll want to do!
The only reason that this didn’t make it to number one is because there ain’t much to talk about. All you do is stand still and press a button to let the power meter go up and then you jump. After jumping you press random buttons to do some kind of crazy tricks. Really it doesn’t even matter what you do, just click on the arrow keys and you’ll start spinning around. THAT’S ALL THERE IS IN THIS GAME! Who the hell would pay actual money to play this game?! If this was a free to play game on a website, you wouldn’t even take time to try it out because there is nothing to do. You just spin and spin and that’s all there is.
As you can guess from that bit of rage, i have tried out this game and i was getting really mad while playing it. Don’t try this at home!
Oh god.. Who the hell would want to make such a shitty game?! (See what i did there) And who the hell would want to play this? I only played this because i had to know how bad this game was. At first it looked like any other Simulator game. Same graphics and same boring economic stuff, but then i realized that the economy in this game makes no sense.
You can pay a guy twenty thousand dollars to smash someone’s toilet so you can rebuild the toilet. This makes absolutely no sense, who the hell would pay TWENTY THOUSAND for that. And that’s not the worst thing, you can actually hire a guy for FIFTY THOUSAND to vomit in someone’s toilet so you can clean/replace it, and sometimes they even fail at this. If you pay someone fifty thousand to vomit in someone’s toilet, there shouldn’t be a chance of failing, you’re not talking about 5 dollar here, you paid more money than you need to do research for new items for toilets, which absolutely make no sense at all.
You can do research on new toilet seats and flushes and all the other useless stuff, but most of the time you won’t be able to use them because you don’t have enough money to buy new property to place them. Another thing that makes no sense.
Oh and there’s colored toilet paper in this game, give me some of that blue toilet paper man.
Like i said before, i haven’t played this game because the first video I’ve seen of this game on youtube was enough. This game is probably the most boring simulator with Bungee Jumping Simulator. The only thing you do here is pick up a drill and place it on the road that needs to be fixed, once you’ve placed it on the right spot it will start drilling and that’s all it is. You’ll have to do this over and over and i thought that you’d unlock new equipment while progressing to newer levels. Well, guess what, you don’t.
You keep drilling and drilling. The only difference is that you’ll be drilling a different street in a different landscape. The NPC construction workers will just look around while you’re drilling non-stop and working your ass off.
I just can’t play this, i’m too young to die..